A Guy Named Psycho

Did you hear there might be a serial killer in Colorado? Terrible tragedy, three bodies discovered on rural property, other people missing. Authorities are in search of a suspect, but the part that strikes me the most about this news story is the subhead: Law enforcement won’t say how they connected Baroz to the human remains.

Seriously?! It doesn’t take a genius to figure this one out. I’m pretty sure they made the connection because their suspect’s name is Adre “Psycho” Baroz. Psycho, as in, “a deranged or psychopathic person; mentally unstable; crazy.” Hell of a nickname, ain’t it? At least I hope that’s a nickname and not his actual middle name from birth (though that would be a strong argument in favor of predestination). I’m venturing to guess one doesn’t earn a nickname like Psycho unless one has committed some truly heinous atrocities. You know, like murdering people and stuff.

You might recall my nickname in high school was Jimmy Olsen. An unassuming, nose-to-the-grindstone writer in the DC Comics universe. Which is exactly what I turned out to be.

I mean yeah, if they want to jump through hoops and go through with a trial, that’s fine and dandy. Constitutional rights, innocent until proven guilty, yadda yadda. Just don’t put me on the jury because you’re going to have a hard time convincing me a guy named Psycho didn’t commit the crime while some guy not named Psycho did.


This made me laugh extra hard today.

Oh Rudy, you incompetent buffoon. Your fall from grace was complete long before the Borat sequel or the Four Seasons Total Landscaping debacle. Any defendant of yours would surely cry fowl.


Here’s a new file for the Embarrassment Department: I called my mom “babe” in an email today.

It was an honest mistake. She’d emailed both me and Tara. I thought I was replying to my wife when I wrote, I never let an opportunity for a pun slip away, babe!

I didn’t even realize my mistake until I got the following reply: Babe? Your mother!??

It’s never a good sign when you see an interrobang.

I apologized to the woman who birthed me, told her I’d thought I was replying to Tara (oops), and said she should just consider it a sign of affection.

Still not sure if I’m writing every day this month…



Categories: Current Events

Tags: , , , , , , , ,

16 replies

  1. Hi Mark, I will catch up reading blogs this weekend and the first one I read talks about a “Psycho.” A great place to start.

    I am happy your nickname was “Jimmy Olsen.” Our planet is a little safer when given a name like this. (I think)🙂 OMgoodness, your Mom, “Babe.” I hope she took it as a compliment. Something about a man marrying a lady as wonderful as his Mom. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I thought Jimmy Olsen was more of a photographer–wait, is that why we’ve been deluged with photos?

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Did your mom respond?
    My neighbor’s cousin just died. Her name was Stoney (the cousin). I said, “Tell me she didn’t die of a drug overdose.” The response: “Yep.” I said, “Unfortunate nickname. Seems she lived up to it.” But, no. Turns out that was the name she was given at birth.
    Really?! (Interrobang.)
    Still don’t know if I’m reading every day, but darn it, you do seem to hit my inbox at just the right time lately. Even if you didn’t fully appreciate the grandeur of my Chex Mix photo.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. You have to feel sorry for Psycho’s defense attorney. Poor guy doesn’t stand a chance.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I am fond of interrobangs and feel that anyone who knows what they are and supports the use of them is no turkey. He might be a Jimmy Olsen, but not a turkey.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Sometimes when my brother visits or when we’re visiting him, I accidentally call him “honey” or some other term of endearment one wouldn’t normally use with a sibling. Force of habit.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. My daughter has mistakenly texted me instead of her hubby. Benign things like what they need at the store. Last time, I texted back and said to please not start sexting me. That got me no response! Lol!

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: