Author: Swinged Cat

I'm a professional writer and editor living his best life in the Black Hills of South Dakota.

The day a notorious mobster taught me how to make pasta sauce.

I was saddened to hear the news that Ray Liotta passed away today. But I was downright mortified by my friend Ashley's response. You know what? I was salty! I was a freakin' container of Morton's Iodized because Goodfellas is probably my all-time favorite movie, and Ray Liotta's portrayal of notorious mobster-turned-FBI-informant Henry Hill is … Continue reading The day a notorious mobster taught me how to make pasta sauce.

Our tomatoes survived the big chill better than Kevin Costner.

It's been cold here. So cold, we had record lows the past two nights. At one point Saturday, my wipers were beating furiously to keep snow from accumulating on my windshield. Believe it or not, snow in May isn't all that unusual here. Most years, we at least get a dusting. But usually at the … Continue reading Our tomatoes survived the big chill better than Kevin Costner.

Screw the Joneses; I’m letting my dandelions grow!

For years, I've had a love/hate relationship with dandelions. Admittedly, it was light on love. OK, fine. A hate/hate relationship. Whatevs. I don't want to be dramatic and say dandelions were the bane of my existence, but then again, subtlety has never been my strong suit. Let's just say I devoted a lot of time … Continue reading Screw the Joneses; I’m letting my dandelions grow!

Farewell Voyage of the S.S. No Name

It's been quite a productive weekend so far! With sunshine and temperatures in the 60s, Tara's been busy in the garden. First, she built a row cover for her raised beds. This is to protect them from the cold. We've probably seen our last freezing temperature of the season, but they're forecasting lows in the … Continue reading Farewell Voyage of the S.S. No Name

Time zones will be the death of me.

Tuesday afternoon. I'm in Hartford, South Dakota, working away on my laptop. Two interviews are in the can; the third is scheduled for 3 p.m., half an hour away, so I've got time. Or so I think. An email pops up, interrupting my work. We hope everything is okay. We waited at the shop for … Continue reading Time zones will be the death of me.

You can ring my dinner bell.

A couple of months ago, Tara got involved in online estate auctions. She'd bid on vintage items like swag lamps and wicker mirrors. The idea is to buy them cheap, clean them up, then turn around and sell them for a profit. She even considered renting space at St. Joe Antiques Mall, but there's a … Continue reading You can ring my dinner bell.

Guac-blocked by the Supreme Dictator.

Thank god it’s May 5. Not because I love Cinco de Mayo or anything (though I appreciate a taco or margarita as much as the next fella). I’m just glad I don’t have to deal with all that “May the Fourth be With You” Star Wars-themed nonsense anymore. Apparently, May 4 has been associated with … Continue reading Guac-blocked by the Supreme Dictator.

I skipped Florida for a brothel instead.

I’m the only member of the marketing department in the office until Thursday. Everybody else on my team is basking in sunny Fort Lauderdale. Actually, they’re not basking. They’re conferencing. Which makes me feel a little better about being stuck behind. And if I’m being totally honest, I’m not much of a Florida person anyway. … Continue reading I skipped Florida for a brothel instead.

“Nobody” doesn’t mean “no body.”

I was taking a stroll around the office recently and happened upon an interesting sight. A man had pulled his pickup truck onto a grassy area beside the road and was furiously digging a hole. I discreetly snapped a pic. That’s weird, right? It’s not like he was gardening or planting a tree. I’ll admit, … Continue reading “Nobody” doesn’t mean “no body.”

Still horn-y after all these years.

Friday evening was wild. Actually, the whole day felt heavy with anticipation. Like things were going to happen. Sure enough... It began when I stepped onto the front porch at 5:30 for my morning walk. The air was pungent with the earthy aroma of rain. Which was odd, given that there wasn't a cloud in … Continue reading Still horn-y after all these years.